Saturday, March 10, 2012

The Point V2. - Vol. 8 - "The Epitome of Awesomeness"

I haven't typed a movie review since my days as a college student, and I think I'll keep it at that.  I will tell you that I saw John Carter tonight.  Was it the next Star Wars? It was not. Was it worth the money to see in the theater? Yes, depending on what you expect to experience from viewing a movie.  John Carter was an entertaining sci-fi adventure. It's complete with a love story for all you female readers. It has fun alien CGI creatures for the (older) kids.  For the guys, there was plenty of action, special effects, and Princess cleavage shots.  I expected a lot out of this movie since I've been told that Edgar Rice Burroughs created the template of modern science fiction around a hundred years ago. I wasn't disappointed, and I wasn't thoroughly impressed either. But I can honestly say that I was entertained for a couple hours, and isn't that the point of going to the movies?

John Carter says "Go see my movie 5 times"
So, if John Carter wasn't the epitome of awesomeness, then why did I title this edition of the Point that? John Carter kicked off the beginning of Blockbuster movie season, or as I've dubbed it this year...the epitome of awesomeness.  Yes, it's the begining of March and guess what...the summer movies are on the way.  It seems as if each year the release dates happen earlier and earlier.  John Carter was in production for over 2 years and had a budget of a couple hundred million has all of the requirements to be a summer blockbuster except it was released in March.  So, in my book, Awards season is done and Blockbuster season has begun.

As this month continues, more big movies are released. The Hunger Games and Wrath of the Titans are two of the biggest, but movies like 21 Jump Street and Mirror Mirror have to be considered as major releases as well. April brings us American Reunion, The Raven, and The Three Stooges. March and April may be a little light for major film releases, but considering we haven't had a major blockbuster released since Sherlock Holmes and Mission Impossible last December, I'll take what I can get. Plus, I know how May is going to kick start the epitome of awesomeness into overdrive.

Hulk smash competition.
On May 4th, the Point's most anticipated movie is released. Marvel's the Avengers is the official kick off to the "summer" blockbusters. Not many movies want to follow the unprecedented Avengers film where five solo superhero movies (4 stand alone characters, 1 with a sequel) lead up to the culmination of the largest team-up film that I can ever remember. After a few weeks, some more blockbusters pop up...Dark Shadows, Battleship and Men in Black III wrap up the rest of the month.  But the awesomeness rolls right into June with Snow White and the Huntsman and Prometheus. Then, the best president turned vampire slayer movie is released...that would be Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. The Rock and Bruce Willis help to finish off the month with the rebooted sequel (requel) for G.I. Joe: Retaliation.

After the first four months, the epitome of awesomeness has lived up to its name...but honestly, it has only just begun.  The Amazing Spider-Man has a Fourth of July release date. And let's not forget that Batman returns to the screen in the Dark Knight Rises at the end of July.  Then throughout August and September movies like Total Recall, The Bourne Legacy, Dredd, The Wettest Country, The Expendables 2, Killing Them Softly (formerly Cogan's Trade), Looper, and Resident Evil: Retribution. Things even spill over a little bit into October with The Gangster Squad and Tim Burton's Frankenweenie. It slows down a bit, but November does have Skyfall and the Red Dawn remake. But the year makes a dramatic close with the Hobbit, World War Z, and Quentin Tarantino's Django Unchained.

So, I guess the epitome of awesomeness is this entire year in movies...minus January and February. I hope you all saved your pennies, because we're about to go broke going to the movie theater. Normally, I'd go off on a long-winded negative rant about some random thing bothering me, but John Carter gave me hope for a fantastic blockbuster season this year which put me in a strangely positive mood. Thanks once again for using the internet for something other than porn or Facebook and taking your time to read my blog. Be sure to go see John Carter and then tune in next time for the zany adventures of the one and only self-proclaimed semi-professional procrastinator that doubles as an entertainment guru...or as my mom called me...that damn lazy couch potato.